i didn't wanted to study today. crap. just felt so much like sitting at home and do nothing. but there are some things that i simply just can't ignore. like my homework, more exams, more test, not understanding teacher's markings, etc. boon hwee once said: aiya ah kwok where got stress over studies one... hey boon. i prove you wrong. apparently gp and cse are just the things that i stress about. this is crap. i mean i totally dont understand why my gp score remains stagnant. i simply just can't understand...i wanna do well for gp and cse!

what to do. there are so many things i want to do. yet, i hope that the ns enlistment notice does not come this month, seriously and cross my heart. then again this big A is blocking the way. i dont want to be left in a dilemma where i always have to decide between two or more choices that i cannot let go...

i just kind of had a tiff not a major quarrel or whatever with my sister. she claims that she does not like the me who always talks irrelevant stuff. i mean like if she asks: how ar? the internet not working le? then i would normally reply: how i know??(laughs) then she gives me the glare. i mean like i just simply cannot change the way i am, especially now when im searching for my own and usual self, my own personality. currently just tell me where my problem lies would be enough, cause i will really get pretty angry if the conversation continued. i would not want to show my angered self. im trying to contain it. just dont open the lid...